Zoe:
This is our annotation 3 and Ivy and I would further discuss about
whether parents should intervene with children’s decisions or something. Yeah,
and first will be Ivy’s annotation.
Ivy: OK, and it’s my annotation’s topic
that Leave Your Children Alone. And uh… I want to show you guys a short film
that it’s about Vicki Hoefle to introduce herself. (short film playing) OK and
this video…this short film can let you know who’s Vicki Hoefle. Because now I
want to introduce you a book. She’s the author. And Vicki Hoefle has a new
education named Duct Tape Parenting. It’s a way to let children to live without
restraint. And it also emphasize to strengthen the relationship between parent and
children. Vicki also say that it’s a long plan. And why this education named
Duct Tape Parenting is because that Vicki say when you want to give your
children an order or help, then you have to image a tape that can tape your
mouth and tape your hand so that can avoid parents can’t help to over help
their children. And in my early article, I said that overprotection and making
all decision for children is some kind of parents’ distrust. In Vicki’s book, she
said that parents have to give their children two things. It’s trust and
chance. Trust is the base of good parent-children relationship. Because only
when parents trust their children, their children can trust parents and trust
themselves. And chance is the beginning of children’s self-growing. Because
only parents give children chance to do something else on their own, they can
learn how to solve the problem by themselves. And Vicki also said that parents
can’t give children overprotection and making all decision for them. Because
the real world is not as simple as children thought if parents give them too
much overprotection. When they grow up and find that this society isn’t as
simple as they thought, they cannot do it well by themselves. Making all
decision will let children don’t have their own space to learn how to arrange
their own life. Vicki also said that making mistakes is the easiest and the
most efficient way to let children face the challenges and difficulties in the
future. Vicki said that parents have to let nature to teach the children. And
what’s nature’s lecture? I want to give you some example. One day, Tom forgot
to bring the coat to school, and then he will feel cold so that he couldn’t get
out with his friends, and because of that, he will remember to bring the coat
next time. It’s some kind of nature’s lecture. And now I want to give you my
conclusions that parents have to give their trust and chance to children. And
the second is nature will has its own method to teach the children. And the
third, parents have to be relax, and trust that mistakes can make children
learn better. It’s my reference.
Zoe:
Okay, and for my annotation 3, um the reference I search for on
internet, and I found out that it is filled with um um articles against tiger
mother, but um I think that there are misconceptions, so I think that um who
else would be a better subject to clear out the misconceptions besides her own
daughter? So for annotation 3, I would be um talking about clearing the
misconceptions of tiger mother by the mouth of her daughter Sophia Chua, who
recently was received by both yale university and Harvard University. And
first, I will show you a short clip from Wall Street Journel. Okay, and okay.
The first myth I would like to clear about is that many people think that tiger
mother parenting method is about totally control, from the day child was born
to the day when the child become an adult, or maybe get um get into a college
or get into marriage or something. But from the article of Sophia Chua and also
the interview, she talks about that “ I think that your strict parnting force
me to become an independent thinker and make the most of opportunities. So it
is not about that total control would make children have um to loose the
ability to make their own decisions. It is the misunderstanding of tiger mother
parenting method. And also from the interview we can know that Sophia said that
um her mother hardly intervene after she goes into high school. So um from the
interview we can know that one of the teaching method of tiger mother is to
tell her what to do when she was young, and then when the parent think that my
children have the ability to make right decisions, they would let go and let
them to face the difficulties by themselves, rather than decide them of what
they should do for future occation. And the second myth is alienation. Many
people um they talk about that the high pressure of the parents giving to
children would cause alienation between parent and children. and also because of the high pressure, children
would in turn gain their distrust to their parents and would not rather um
prefer to share their feelings to their parents. Um but um from the article of
Sophia from New York Post: why I love my strict Chinese mother, um I can saw
her fully love and her fully trust and the bond between her and her mother. And
in fact, the book, Battle Rhythem, Amy Chua did get permission from both of her
daughter to publish the book, so, if they are really alienated, why would they
agree to publish the things in the family? So I think that the tiger mother
parenting method is actually a two way feedback, because the mother gives fully
care and gives fully trust to their children, and in turn children would have
fully trust to their mother and would prone to ask for advice from their
parents. So um my conclusion is that tiger mother parenting method is not about
directing which way to go but building the confidence and working habits. Okay
tada, any question?
Vicky: I think that you said that tiger
mother did not choose for which way should go but actually when her children
are young, tiger mother did choose what the what she think about that they
should learn piano. Because in I have read the book, she didn’t let her
children to learn other instrument other than piano. So she is choosing her way
for her children, what do you think about this.
Zoe:
well my point of view is that children don’t actullay know what they
want when they are young. Teah so um when later, um she did intervene with
her children when they are young. But
Sophia did mention that after she goes into high school, when um Amy thinks
that Sophia has the ability to make good decisions, she let her go and let her
do choose what university she will attend to, what classes she will go to , and
um what subject she will major in in university.
Vicky: But what if the children before want
to learn other instruments like drums or guitars, but she oppose of and want
her children to play piano.
Zoe: because yeah I did read that part in the
battle rhythem. Like maye it is not high class enough and only wants her
children to learn piano and violin. Well, yeah, I am not totally agree to tiger
mother, but I think that it is still important direct the main decisions of
what the chil
